Trip to Taured

Gaelcholaiste Luimnigh

Please give this to Elaine and Martin Creighton, Dublin 12, Ireland.

Dear Mom and Dad,

My trip to Spain didn’t go to plan. Everything up until boarding the plane went perfectly. There were no delays, no lost baggage, nothing. I entered the cabin and at some point I must have fallen asleep because when I woke up I was…. honestly, I don’t know where I was.   It looked to be some sort of storage room. It wasn’t the luggage hold or anything, I wasn’t in the air. I wasn’t on the plane anymore. My first thought was that I had been kidnapped but when I turned around, I realised it was far worse than that. It could only be described as some sort of ‘portal’. The hole hovered in mid-air I could see clear as day, the plane I had been on. Had I fallen through some sort of hole in the world? This portal obviously defied all laws of physics but right there and then, that was the least of my problems. This portal was about a foot in width and height, far too small for me to get through. Upon closer inspection, I realised that it was shrinking. Slowly, it may be shrunk by a centimetre every minute, but it was shrinking nonetheless. This jolted me from the frozen state I had been in. I needed to find another portal fast or I would be stuck here forever.

I exited the storage room and immediately bumped into someone. I muttered an apology and walked past him, trying to ignore the string of curses he yelled at me. At least I thought they were curses, he seemed to be speaking a mix of Spanish and French. Outside the room I seemed to be in an airport, judging by the sheer amount of people milling about the place. Strangely, they all were wearing clothes from the 1950s and yet talking into phones from the 90s.

As I walked around looking for another portal I noticed some other unusual details about this parallel world. Everyone had a tattoo of an animal on their left hand.  The animals varied from elephants to tigers and then other mammals too. Also, all the signs were in the same language the angry man had spoken. The only word that kept popping up on these signs was ‘Taured’ which is what I guessed this place was called.

I had become so engrossed in absorbing as much information possible that I failed to notice the security officer in this place had noticed me. With my modern day apparel, it’s no wonder I stuck out like a sore thumb. He walked over and began to question me. Since I didn’t speak the language I just started to wave my hands at him. It’s then when he noticed. When he saw I had no tattoo on my hand, the blood drained from his face. He pulled a whistle from his pocket and blew it so loudly everyone within a mile radius stopped to look at me. I did what any true man would in this situation.   With a squad of guards chasing me, I ran for five minutes solid and arrived back where I started. I bolted the storage room door shut and threw whatever I could at the door, mainly boxes that had been in the corner of the room.

It was then that I noticed the portal, now only the size of my hand. Dismayed, I searched the room for anything I could use, anything at all.   I found a box full of pens and the paper which I am currently writing on. Any minute now, the guards are going to break through that door. I’m putting this letter through the portal. If you find it please come and get me. I just want to come home.

Please help, I’m freaking out.